At 45 years old you'd think it was long overdue, but tonight I came out to my parents. I'm bi and have been struggling with realizing/admitting that to myself for the better part of 30 years. Being attracted to both men and women was confusing in the beginning, but after a couple a years I accepted that at least I wasn't straight. Only the last year or so have I finally concluded that I'm bi. I never planned on coming out until I had a "real" reason, like a boyfriend, but this summer I've been thinking a lot and realized that not being out, at least with my parents, was really affecting my mood and general wellbeing. I really needed to do something about that. Even if I was still single.
I decided to go visit them this evening and planned on telling them even if I didn't know if I would have the courage to do so. When I got there it turned out my older brother was there too and I decided that that was a sign that tonight was the night. Now or never. After some chatting about this and that I finally mustered the courage and told them and it went really well. They were all very accepting and supporting, which felt great. To be honest I hadn't expected anything else from my parents, possibly some awkward questions, but I wasn't sure about my brother who have made some borderline homophobic remarks before. But he was actually very understanding and accepting. Even though I had expected it to go well, I was still nervous at the time and I'm very relieved now. It's an awesome feeling to know that your closest family knows who you really are and it feels very liberating.
I still haven't come out to my other relatives and friends, but I'm fairly sure that those I care about won't have a problem with me being bi, and the others are no big deal if they have a problem with it. I can live without them in my life if needed. I don't know when I'll start coming out to my friends, but I guess I'll know when the time is right. :-)
So why start this thread? Well, I thought it was time for my first post here in the forum and after reading some of the other threads started by guys in their early twenties thinking it was something wrong with them not being out or still being virgins I thought it might be good for them to know that some are even older when they come out. Or lose their virginity for that matter. All my confusion led me to lose my "straight" virginity when I was 27 and I still haven't been in a relationship or had sex with a man. Partly due to a 10 year relationship with my now ex-wife. I guess now is the time to get a boyfriend and start living. :wink:
If anyone wants to comment or perhaps offer some advise to a late bloomer please go ahead. I'd love to finally have some discussions with other LGBTQ guys.
I decided to go visit them this evening and planned on telling them even if I didn't know if I would have the courage to do so. When I got there it turned out my older brother was there too and I decided that that was a sign that tonight was the night. Now or never. After some chatting about this and that I finally mustered the courage and told them and it went really well. They were all very accepting and supporting, which felt great. To be honest I hadn't expected anything else from my parents, possibly some awkward questions, but I wasn't sure about my brother who have made some borderline homophobic remarks before. But he was actually very understanding and accepting. Even though I had expected it to go well, I was still nervous at the time and I'm very relieved now. It's an awesome feeling to know that your closest family knows who you really are and it feels very liberating.
I still haven't come out to my other relatives and friends, but I'm fairly sure that those I care about won't have a problem with me being bi, and the others are no big deal if they have a problem with it. I can live without them in my life if needed. I don't know when I'll start coming out to my friends, but I guess I'll know when the time is right. :-)
So why start this thread? Well, I thought it was time for my first post here in the forum and after reading some of the other threads started by guys in their early twenties thinking it was something wrong with them not being out or still being virgins I thought it might be good for them to know that some are even older when they come out. Or lose their virginity for that matter. All my confusion led me to lose my "straight" virginity when I was 27 and I still haven't been in a relationship or had sex with a man. Partly due to a 10 year relationship with my now ex-wife. I guess now is the time to get a boyfriend and start living. :wink:
If anyone wants to comment or perhaps offer some advise to a late bloomer please go ahead. I'd love to finally have some discussions with other LGBTQ guys.